Rumor has it Agent Zero–we will refer to him as such from here on out–could be heading to the Lakers after being poorly treated and badly misused by Orlando, and my response to that is… Yes! Give this man another chance to prove that for the past three years he has had the potential to be a top 10 PG in this league. I don’t care what team he goes to, I just want to see him play and show what he really can do. And try this on for size: Agent Zero to World Peace!
I know what everyone must be thinking – “But he brought a gun into the locker room!” I’d like to form a team of all the so-called “baddies” in the NBA and watch as they annihilate any team they play. Gilbert Arenas brought weapons into the locker rooms? I want you on my team! DeMarcus Cousins allegedly sent inappropriate pictures? Great! Lace ’em up and bring your mad face. Michael Beasley and his bags of weed? Suit up my friend! Latrell Sprewell will coach, and that will be that. We’ll make the Jail Blazers look like the Portland Royal Dandies.
This team may not make it to game 2 without an instance of curb stomp or cannibalization, but they’d likely make the playoffs, because a player’s criminal record doesn’t really matter once the game has started. There are games to be won, people, and let us remind you that a three time NBA champion once had an affinity for kicking camera men in the crotch.
So Agent Zero – Lower The Rim would like you to know that you are always safe here with us, along with The Worm, Bill Laimbeer, and Rowdy Roddy Piper. And in celebration of your potential return we have posted a video of your demolition of Deron Williams and the Utah Jazz.
That’s word for what freakin’ ails ya.