Word on the street–more like a shady back alley–is that Allen Iverson has been spotted in the Charlotte area, and according to at least one questionable and meandering blog post, this could mean Iverson and MJ have something in need of discussing. Could this be so?
FOR OPTIMISTS: Yes, this is definitely so. It makes perfect sense. If Iverson is to ever make his long awaited return, it will most certainly come by way of a bottom feeder, as it is clear no contending squad wants anything to do with him. Being that Charlotte is now president of the all-time suck club, it seems a nice landing spot for a guy who has come to terms with the fact that he likely won’t be playing heavy minutes for a contender at this point, and would like at the very least to quietly re-eneter the scene and catch a few GMs off guard. ALSO, those of us who love AI know all too well that Iverson and Jordan have a history. Iverson once punked His Airness twice in the one sequence. Iverson was also on the court during Jordan’s final game, and the two appeared to have fostered a mutual respect for one another. And to top it off, Iverson is a superstar “past his prime” who still thinks he can play. Jordan was once the very same, and it’s possible he empathizes with The Answer’s plight. AND AT THE VERY LEAST… what’s the worst that could happen? Honestly, the Bobcats are still anywhere from 5-50 years away from contending, meaning the only thing Bobcat brass can hope for is to fill the seats. Ipso facto, Iverson’s your guy. I honestly can’t think of any other player within the realm of attainability for a team like the Bobcats that would provide that kind of revenue boost just by showing up.
FOR SKEPTICS: In this day and age, most inquiry and preliminary correspondence takes place long distance. Reasonably speaking, the only point at which it would make sense for a team to literally bring in Iverson would be the point at which a workout is in order, or documents need signed. And if this were the case, we certainly would have heard all about it by now. Sorry everyone, it’s probably more likely that AI is visiting some new love interest for the weekend than it is he’s sitting down for a chat with the worst owner ever.
LOWER THE RIM‘S TAKE: Quite frankly, we’ve been thoroughly confused by our favorite player’s exile for some time now. There’s most certainly a place for Allen in the league, even if his skills are diminished. Think about all the older guards still hanging around. Are you going to tell us that Derek “I Used to Wear My Headband Like Earmuffs” Fisher is better than Allen Iverson? Is Chauncey Billups better? Jason “Punched My Wife in the Face Once” Kidd? God awful Mike Bibby? We’ll take AI at half speed over any of those guys. And if you’ve listened to him at all lately, clearly he’s been humbled by what he’s been through the last few years. He’s not Detroit AI. He’s not Memphis AI. He’s definitely a guy who’s willing to come in and be a spark off the bench. Look at the Miami Heat. They’re a little bit of bench production away from multiple championships. Are you going to tell us that a team like Miami wouldn’t benefit from having The Answer coming off the bench for 15 to 20 minutes a clip? And he’ll probably do it for next to nothing at this point! For a guy who puts butts in the seats the way he does, it’s almost a business no brainer. Bring in Allen Iverson. He’ll probably help your team, and even if he doesn’t, he’s likely to pad your team’s bankroll. With all that said, here’s a flashback–set to the appropriate music–to wet your appetite. We’re hip.